The Facts of Life–from a 9-year-old

We’d had a pleasant day visiting Grandma Bev, when on our way home my four-year-old pops out, “Cameron, you can be my husband and I’ll be your wife!”

My nine-year-old is a bit more than apalled, “We can’t get married, Nikki.”

“But I want to have a baby!” she argues.

“We’re brother and sister, so we can’t get married.  That’s just the way it is.”

“Then I’ll marry Mommy!” she spouts off, without missing a beat.

Cameron laughs, “You can’t marry Mommy!”

“Why not?”

“Two girls can’t get married–it’s all about the Yin and Yang, that’s why!”

“What’s the Yin and Yang?” Nikki asks, clearly interested in finding out.

“I can’t tell you,” Cameron admits, “You’ll need to wait until your much older, besides if I married you, we’d probably get divorced anyway.”

“No, we wouldn’t,” she argued, “Because in order to get divorced, you have to have kids first.”

It’s true, I should have said something, but I clearly had no idea where to begin.  It isn’t that I won’t talk to them about these things.  If I don’t, someone else certainly will.  But I’ll need to do a bit of pondering.  Any ideas?

About Michelle J Brewer

Free-spirited and unwilling to let life throw a curve she can't handle Michelle hasn't done it all, but what she does do she lands on her feet with her hands in the air. Currently a writer of screenplays, she knows the only true way to benefit in her life is by sharing valuable information. Helping others grow to better their own lives, and loving it at the same time, gives her a sense of accomplishment. This blog will discuss what she is working on and how it's progressing. When you want to know more about MJ Brewer, you can check out her blog at to get the inside scoop! Have fun and please volunteer your feedback!
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2 Responses to The Facts of Life–from a 9-year-old

  1. JD McD says:

    The comment: “Because in order to get divorced, you have to have kids first.”seens to me that she thinks divorce is predicated on having kids which is another way for her to take on the guilt that she is the reason for the split. My advice…try to help her to see that the children have nothing to do with the responsibility for the split. People who don’t have kids also divorce. Divorce means there is no way we can ever agree to keep want to be together forever. If you marry wisely, before children come along, it is easier to be clear headed and choose the right partner. You might try to find a way to let her know that you were simply not a good paring. It is all about not getting together before you really know the other person. Whether or not there are children, staying together is the result of good or bad choices. It is all on the Grownups. One of the real blessings is having the children to love, regardless of whether the couple paring is permanent or not. In the best case senario all of this is considered BEFORE kids are involved.

    • MJ Brewer says:

      Well, I believe she feels this way because I’m always stressing that babies shouldn’t be born until she is married. But since I’m not married (and perfectly happy that way) she feels like she needs to get married, have children, and then get divorced. I believe it’s her simplistic and childlike way of seeing a single woman with kids being happy.

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